


I'm With You

by mimanchiandrea



Series: Meredith and Andrew's Journey to Forever [1]
Category: Andrew DELUCA - Fandom, Grey's Anatomy, Meredith GREY - Fandom, Merluca - Fandom, mental illness - Fandom
Genre: Andrew DeLuca - Freeform, Based on Grey's Anatomy, F/M, Inspired by Grey's Anatomy, Meredith Grey - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:08:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 16,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22980736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mimanchiandrea/pseuds/mimanchiandrea
Summary: Andrew DeLuca starts showing signs of his father's mental illness as Meredith Grey does all she can to help him through it.
Relationships: MerLuca
Series: Meredith and Andrew's Journey to Forever [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1715284
Comments: 55
Kudos: 115





	1. Looking like that, you'll open some wounds.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first merluca fanfiction and the story entails basically how I wish the show would address Andrew's illness, with Meredith by his side. The title of my story is based off of Vance Joy's song I'm With You and the chapter titles are lyrics from the song. The song really reminds of merluca, so I would definitely recommend.

Meredith Grey had done something totally unexpected. She had fallen in love with Andrew DeLuca. This was surprising on a number of levels for someone as dark and twisty as her. The fact that Andrew DeLuca was a resident was surprising. The fact that Andrew DeLuca had dated her sister was surprising. The fact that Andrew DeLuca had been her student for four years and she never felt a connection prior was surprising. The fact that Andrew DeLuca had took a severe beating from her best friend and she defended Alex right to his face was surprising. The fact that Andrew DeLuca was not Derek Shepherd was surprising. 

Meredith Grey thought that she would never fall in love. And then she did with Derek. And then he died and she thought she could never love anyone but him. He was the love of her life. Her soulmate. Her other half. The father of her children. She thought her heart was destined to be his forever. But then time went on and life moved forward. It still hurt knowing that Derek was gone forever, but she found happiness in other things that kept her going. Her kids. Her job. Her sisters. Her Alex. Life was fine without a significant other, but everyone kept pushing her to get back into the dating scene. After rejecting all of her friends’ pleas, she finally gave in just to get it over with. This of course led to Nathan Riggs. He was kind and funny and handsome and he knew what it was like to lose the person you love most in this world. It was a healthy pairing, but Meredith always felt so off in the relationship. At the end of the day, Nathan Riggs was not Derek Shepherd. There was no passion. And Meredith always felt so guilty with him, like she was cheating. That’s the funny thing about having a spouse die, you didn’t choose to end the marriage so you still feel an obligation to them and the vows. She would go out with Nathan, then come home to her post-it note vows and just hate herself. But then Megan Hunt miraculously rose from the dead and Meredith felt two things; relieved and jealous. Relieved that there was now an excuse to end the relationship. Jealous that it wasn’t Derek who was the alive one. Meredith performed the biggest surgery of her career thus far that enabled her to win the most prestigious award a surgeon can receive and then she gladly said goodbye to Nathan Riggs for good. 

And that was it for Meredith in the dating department. She had tried and it failed and she was perfectly fine with that. But then she met a patient named CeCe who forced her to rethink everything. Meredith would be lying if she said she didn’t miss the feeling of being loved and loving someone else. Having someone who loved you more than anything and having you be the most special person in their life. Having someone to fall asleep and wake up next to. Having someone to talk to. Having someone to kiss and be intimate with. She did miss that connection that you get when you love someone else. So, Meredith reluctantly went on a string of dates with total duds. Dates that she always ended early with the help from Alex. And just when she was ready to give up, a very sweet, attractive, and Italian resident confessed his feelings for her. Ever since their accidental and embarrassing peck on the lips at Jo and Alex’s wedding, they grew closer. And the rest was history. Meredith Grey fell in love with Andrew DeLuca. 

If only things could be that simple for Meredith Grey. As pure and gentle and loving as Meredith and Andrew’s relationship was, there always seemed to be something getting in their way. And just as they were finally finding their way back to each other, something unexpected happened that would change their relationship forever. Andrew had a manic episode. Just like his father. Something that would affect Andrew for the rest of his life. But, Andrew doesn’t understand what’s wrong and in the process he pushed Meredith away. 

Carina’s words had haunted Meredith all day. She didn’t want her to be right, she just wanted him to be exhausted and over-worked. He was, but he was also sick. Meredith knew she had to step in, it was her duty to Suzanne as Chief of General Surgery and her duty as the woman who loved Andrew DeLuca deeply. It broke her heart to see him trapped inside himself. She did her best not to take his words to heart because if this is really what she and Carina believe this is, he has no control of his words or actions. He is completely blind to what he is doing. He looked so tired and stressed out. He became way too obsessive over the case and talked a million miles a minute. Everyone who talked to him seem to piss him off and send him into rage. He yelled at Hayes. He yelled at Bailey. He yelled at his patient. And he yelled at her, the woman he has loved more than he has loved anything in his life. Meredith was heartbroken to see her sweet Andrew completely disappear. She just wanted to pull him into an on call room and hold him as he finally slept. Her efforts to calm him failed and she hurt him deeply. She said he sounded like his father and as someone who has done everything in their power to not be like their mother, she knew how these words must of stung. But they needed to be said. Andrew needed a wake-up call that he was not okay. The way his face fell when she said it made Meredith want to fall apart herself. But she held it in and tried to coax him once more into sleep. Instead, he ended them for good leaving Meredith devastated and at a loss of what to do next.


	2. And we woke up to the sound of a storm outside.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter follows the episode of the blizzard and Meredith's feelings toward Andrew's injuries.

His hands were dark purple. His face was red, bruised from the cold. And he was in utter denial of how serious his injuries were, especially for someone who’s career revolves around his hands. If she could, Meredith would treat him herself and hold him until he warmed up. But she was in the middle of surgery, so the only thing she could do was page Jackson for him. Following the surgery, Carina found her to let her know what was happening.

“How is he?” asked Meredith. 

“He’s a mess. His hands are just awful and all he wants to do is help other patients. Avery has practically had to strap him to the bed. But he’s warming up and Avery thinks as long as he does what he says, he’ll be fine,” responds Carina. 

“Jesus,” signed Meredith. “Carina, how can we help him?” 

“There’s not much we can do. With papa, he is completely blind to what he’s doing wrong. A lot of the times he doesn’t even realize how bad it is until the episode is over, but even then, he is in complete denial that he sick. We just have to wait for Andrea to ride it out and try to make him understand he needs help,” explained Carina. 

“Let’s go see him now. What’s more rock bottom then nearly losing his hands?” suggested Meredith. 

The two most important women in Andrew DeLuca’s life approached his room, trying to make their case yet again for him to realize something is wrong. And just like before, he snapped. Meredith was so hurt by Andrew’s comment about her mother, that she didn’t even hesitate to leave when Andrew kicked her out of the room. She tried to not be affected by his words, but it was impossible. His comment was malicious and intentional. This made Meredith think of the night before her trial. 

“Come with me,” said Andrew. 

“What? Where?” asked a confused Meredith.

Andrew led Meredith out of her house and out to his motorcycle in the driveway. 

“Andrew, what are we doing outside?” continued questioning Meredith. 

“You need a distraction. Tomorrow is a big day and you can worry about it then. But right now, you need to just let loose and forget about everything. So, we are going to go for a ride on my motorcycle,” explained Andrew. 

“Absolutely not! I told you I was never getting on the back of that thing,” protested Meredith.

“So you’re brave enough for jail, but not a ride on my motorcycle?” joked Andrew. 

“I’m serious Andrew, it’s dangerous and I have three kids sleeping inside that need me,” said Meredith. 

“Mer, I would never let the person I love most in this world come to any harm,” comforted Andrew. 

And just like that, he made her swoon. He always made her swoon with that sweet voice, charming smile, and his adorable head tilt that was reserved just for her. Meredith took the spare helmet out of Andrew’s hand and got on the back of his bike.

“Hold on tight,” said Andrew. 

Meredith did as told and was terrified when they first took off. But as they got more into the city, she got more comfortable and took a look at the view. Seattle was always so beautiful at night. She enjoyed the wind, the views, and the feeling of being so close to him. They stopped at a spot overlooking the water and the boats. They got off the bikes and Andrew stood behind Meredith, placing his arms around her waist in a hug and resting his head on her shoulder, as she relaxed her head on his chest. 

“Thank you, I needed this,” said Meredith.

“Of course, you know I would do anything to make you smile,” responded Andrew and placed a kiss on the top of her head. 

How did they get from that to this? How did “I would never let anything harm you” turn into breaking up with her in front of the entire hospital? How did “I would do anything to make you smile” turn into saying hateful comments? How was Meredith supposed to help someone, who wanted nothing to do with her? Where did her Andrew go? And how does she get him back?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! The next chapter is when my story with be a tad different than the show. Hope you enjoy!


	3. I'll be the match to your candle my darling.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meredith reflects on her past and finally opens up to Andrew about her feelings. Also some brief Italian!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Settle in everyone, this is a long one! It is finally time for Meredith to get honest with her feelings. Also their is some Italian speaking at the end, but I am not fluent in the language so the statement is pure google translate, so it might not be a hundred percent correct. Also there is mention of suicidal thoughts. If that is a trigger for you, please do not read. I am not an expert on mental health and do not pretend to be. Hope you all enjoy and thank you for your encouraging comments!

Despite Andrew’s protests for Meredith to leave him alone yesterday, she just couldn’t bear to bring herself away from him when she knew he was in pain. Jackson was performing surgery on Andrew’s hands this morning, so Meredith decided to come to the hospital and make sure everything went okay. After all the people she had lost, she just couldn’t take any chances. Meredith waited until he was put under before entering the OR. 

“Grey, what are you doing in here? No girlfriends allowed,” said Jackson. 

“I’ll be quiet and stay out of the way. I just want to sit by his head. Please Jackson,” pleaded Meredith. 

“Fine. But any signs of something going wrong, you’re out okay? I can’t focus if you’re getting all “shoot me”,” demanded Jackson. 

Meredith just rolled her eyes and pulled up a chair to Andrew’s head. She just stared down at him and ran her fingers through her hair. It was one of her most favorite things to do. Especially after a long day, just cuddling in bed together. Sometimes talking and sometimes just enjoying each other. He had the best hair and Meredith loves it best like this; grown-out, thick, and curly. 

The surgery took just under three hours and Jackson did an impeccable job with his hands. His surgical career will live another day. Meredith had work to do and needed to leave the scene before he woke up in case he became angry with her again. When he was low, she had noticed, he never wanted her input or help. He just wanted to figure it out himself. And what was so frustrating about that was, she completely understood. In her early residency days, when she was in the thick of it with both her parents, Meredith pushed Derek away. She had taken care of herself for so long that she didn’t know how to accept his help and it took almost losing him for good for her to realize that she wasn’t okay. 

Even if Meredith couldn’t understand what exactly Andrew was going through, she was pretty close to going through the same thing at one time. In that moment, lost in her thoughts in her office, Meredith decided to make one last effort to make Andrew understand he wasn’t okay and his behavior is not okay. She walked to his recovery room where an intern was about the change the dressings on his hand. 

“I’ve got those, you can go,” ordered Meredith. 

Meredith began to change the dressings and clean the wound as Andrew tried to get her to go once again. 

“Meredith how many times do I have to tell you? I don’t want to see you! Leave me alone!” shouted Andrew. 

“Shut up, it’s mine turn to speak now,” responded Meredith. 

“Excuse me?” asked Andrew. 

“I said shut up. Just listen to me for one damn minute before interrupting me. I have something to say and once I am done you can scream at me all you want,” began Meredith. 

Andrew did as told and just looked at her confused. Meredith let the silence sit for a minute before she continued. 

“I’m going to tell you a story about my life that I have not shared with anyone in full detail besides my therapist from about a decade ago and my husband. Richard knows bits and pieces, but not the full story and what it did to me. Not even Maggie knows this. Not even Alex or my best friend Cristina all the way in Switzerland. When I was five years old, my mother had just ended her affair with Richard. Not by choice of course. He decided to stay with his wife after she had already imploded her entire marriage. She was pregnant, alone, and really low. And one night she felt so bad, she awoke me in the middle of the night and brought me down to the kitchen. I stood near the doorway as she made her way to the counter. There she proceeded to tell me not to be scared of blood, not to call anyone for help for any reason, and told me to be an extraordinary person. Then she took a scalpel and slit her wrists right in front of me. I was terrified of her and getting in trouble so I waited for her to pass out, then I called 911. While waiting for the ambulance, I sat by her and held her hand in an enormous pool of her own blood. The ambulance came, brought her to the hospital, and stitched her up. And that was that, we never talked about it ever again. Over time, age and the mind protecting itself helped to push the memory deep in the back of my head. It wasn’t until I was an intern and my mom was experiencing a lucid episode with her Alzheimer’s that I remembered in great detail what happened. My mother was disappointed in me, which wasn’t all that unusual, but the words she used to express her anger cut deep. She said word for word, “imagine my disappoint after five years to wake up and discover that you are no more than ordinary”. 

“After she said that, I got lost in myself. I pushed Derek away, I lashed out at my best friend and I just went quiet. I still do it sometimes, but I did it more when I was younger, where if something bad would happen, I would just lock myself up inside. Not talking. Not registering what was going on around me. Just complete utter silence on the outside and inside. It just so happened that there was the huge ferry boat accident the next day where we were needed on the scene. I was helping this little girl find her mom, when I discovered a man severely injured on the edge of the dock. I went over to help him and he was in so much shock that when he tried to get up, he shoved me off the dock. I fell into the water and it was ice cold. I had never felt anything so cold in my life. I swam to the surface and just for a second, I thought what’s the point. I felt so lost and alone and like I could do nothing right. And in that second of thought, I let go. And I drowned. And if it wasn’t for Derek, Richard, Bailey, Cristina, Addison Montgomery, and Preston Burke, I would be dead,” confessed Meredith. 

Meredith never liked to admit that story out loud or think of it. It brought her to a dark time and it always took awhile to get out of it.

“Mer,” started Andrew. 

“It took me a long time to accept that something was wrong with me. That I didn’t respond to difficult situations well. That I didn’t process my emotions in a healthy manner. I went to therapy and in those six weeks of sessions, I turned my life around. I was able to have a healthy relationship with Derek and I started to accept that I could be a great surgeon like my mom, even better if I worked for it. I know you truly don’t believe something is wrong Andrew, but there is. The man that wakes me up in kisses, looks at me with his head tilted and sweet grin, plays soccer with Bailey in the backyard, knows Zola prefers just peanut butter sandwiches instead of peanut butter and jelly, and let Ellis paint his nails five different shades of pink and purple and even wear it to work because she wanted everyone to see how pretty they were, would scream at me. Break up with me in front of the entire hospital. Or lash out at his attendings and sister, who wants nothing more than to help him. You are not acting like yourself and it’s okay Andrew. It’s not your fault, you were born with this. But you can be better than your father. You can accept the help he has always refused. Carina knows your history better than I do and what to do for it, but Andrew please just listen to her and get some help. I know I don’t say this nearly enough, but Andrea DeLuca, ti amo piu di ogni altra cosa (I love you more than anything),” finished Meredith. 

“Okay. I’ll get some help,” whispered Andrew with tears in his eyes.


	4. I was just coasting till we met, you remind me just how good it can get.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew attends therapy and reflects on his relationship with Meredith.

“So, your girlfriend and sister think you’ve lost your mind,” states Claire. 

“I wouldn’t put it in those exact words, but yes. I mean I see where they are coming from, I did lash out at them and a lot of people. But I was tired and annoyed of them trying to say I was like my father,” defends Andrew. 

Andrew sits on the couch of a hospital therapist named Claire. He doesn’t think he needs this. He doesn’t want to have to need this. But he loves Meredith and she asked him to get help. He would do anything for her. 

“Then why are you here? This is your third session and still have gotten nowhere. You don’t respect this and you are determined to believe that you don’t have to be here, so Dr. DeLuca why are you here?” questioned Claire. 

“I already told you this. Both my sister and my girlfriend, or ex, or I’m not exactly sure at this point, think there is something wrong with me,” answers Andrew. 

“That’s why they want you here, why are you here?” continued questioning Claire. 

“Meredith,” admits Andrew. 

“Finally, an honest answer. Let’s talk about Meredith, how long have you two been together?” says Claire. 

“Since last Valentine’s Day,” responds Andrew. 

“You two had worked alongside each other for years prior to that, what pulled you towards each other?” asks Claire. 

“You know, I don’t think I have an exact pinpoint moment from where we went from co-workers to this. But I guess it started after my ex-girlfriend Sam and I broke up. Sam and I had been on and off again and I was devastated when she had to move. I went through some very embarrassing moments, that all happened right in front of Meredith. I camped out on her couch for a week and I got really drunk at a wedding and kissed her when she tried to comfort me. But I guess that’s the moment things changed for me. I guess I just liked the feeling of being near her. Then we started working together more and getting to know each other and I just had a feeling,” explained Andrew. 

“What kind of feeling?” interrupted Claire. 

“Um, well, it’s cheesy. But I just had this feeling that we were meant to be. A feeling that she was the one or could be the one. She just felt like home and I felt really safe around her. I felt comfortable enough to tell her anything, things I had never talked to anyone about. Like my father. I never talked about him with anyone. Not even Sam. Even though I didn’t know her at all, it felt like I had known her forever. That’s kind of how I always feel with her. She has this ability to make me feel like I have known her for five minutes and my entire life at the same time,” reveals Andrew. 

“And do you like feeling that way about her?” analyzes Claire. 

“Yes and no. I mean, I love her more than anything and I love how it feels when we’re together. But it’s difficult to be with someone who you feel like you don’t totally know or know what you mean to them. There were times where I felt like her number one person and other times, where I felt like I meant nothing to her at all. It’s part of why I asked for a break the first time. I felt like she saw no future for us. That she didn’t love me nearly as much as I love her. Which was devastating, because at that time when I thought of my future I thought of her and her kids,” says an honest Andrew. 

“Does this mean, when you broke up with her in front of everyone you meant it?” asked Claire. 

“No that was because I was exhausted and hurt that she would accuse me of being like my father. I also felt betrayed that she went behind my back to Bailey. But now I am processing that she did that because she does truly love me. When I had hurt my hands, she finally for the first time, opened up to me. And I realized that I had been wrong about her feelings towards me. Meredith isn’t really the type of person to express her love with words. She’s been through a lot and I know watching her husband die plays a big role in that. But even when we were together and she wasn’t giving me verbal confirmation about her love, she felt it. She showed it in other ways,” replies Andrew. 

“Can you give an example?” questions Claire. 

Andrew immediately thought back to summertime, when it was his birthday. He had been at work all day and at that time, he hated work. It sucked that she wasn’t there, it angered him that Chief Bailey didn’t have one kind thing to say about her, and it was annoying the way everyone whispered about him and them. So, he was really looking forward to a night with his girl and her kids. He couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate his birthday. But he sadly received a text at lunch time saying that community service was running late and after that she had a meeting with her lawyer, so he should just go to his place for the evening. Andrew went back to his place and opened the door to his apartment, finding it lit up with candles. 

“What’s all this for?” asked Andrew, happy to see her. 

“Well your birthday, of course. Come sit down, I made you some food,” answered Meredith. 

“You cooked?” asked a shocked Andrew. 

“Well not exactly. I didn’t think food poisoning was a very good birthday present, but I wanted to do something special for you. You are always making amazing dinners for me. So, I bought the best wine, made some great sandwiches, and brought supplies to make the best ice-cream sundaes there is,” said Meredith. 

“I love you,” sighed Andrew. 

Then they kissed and they enjoyed their food. Meredith also revealed some very sexy lingerie that she was wearing under her clothes after their meal, but Andrew decided to leave that part out for the therapist. 

“You know your eyes light up the more you talk about her,” stated Claire. 

“Well she’s the best thing that has ever happened to me. So, to further answer your first question, I am here because of Meredith. I am here because I love her more than anything. I am here because I would never speak to her the way I did in a sane state of mind. I am here because she has lost so many people she loves and I refuse to be added to the list. I am here for me because I want a life with her. I am here because she gives me hope, that even if I have what my father has, I can live a good life,” answers Andrew. 

“Alright. Let’s help give you the tools to do that,” responds Claire.


	5. It's high time that you love me, because you do it so well.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapters features Andrew's childhood memories, Carina being the best big sister ever, and MerLuca speaking in Italian.

Three weeks. 

Three weeks of sessions with Dr. Claire Myers. In that time, he has since taken time away from work. Chief Bailey as well as his other supervisors thought it be best that he step away from any patient interaction until Dr. Myers signed off on it. 

In the past three weeks, Andrew had uncovered so many memories and so many realizations he felt like he was drowning. He has had to reface memories he had hid deep in his subconscious of his father when he went through manic episodes. He had to remember the episode that ended with his father killing four people. That ended with his mom packing bags for them to move to the states. That ended with his then teenage big sister Carina refusing to leave their father when he needed help the most. 

Andrew had to feel the pain of losing his mom all over again. He had to relive the best times of his life and the worst. He replayed over every moment of his life in the last year. From his first date with Meredith to when he broke up with her. He had to understand that his family has a history of being bipolar. His father is bipolar. 

And he is bipolar. And it hurts. It hurts to become the thing he always feared. 

It hurts to walk through the hospital with everyone looking at him like he could blow up at any moment. 

It hurts to know that the one person he never wanted to hurt, he did. He always wanted to be the one person in her life that never hurt her. Never leave her. Never cause her any pain or worry. But now he has done all of those things. And he hates himself for it. He feels so ashamed. 

“Andrew? Andrew, where are you?” asks Claire, drawing him out of his thoughts. 

“I-I don’t know. I,” stutters Andrew, lost in a memory. 

“Tell me where you are. Walk me through what you are remembering,” calms Claire. 

“I think, I’m ten. I’m peeking out of my room of my old home. The home in Italy. There are lights outside the window from the police. And I’m watching my father. He’s rambling. He can’t keep a string of thoughts together. He’s throwing things around the room. He’s yelling at my mom. She’s trying to calm him down and the police are attempting to detain him. He keeps shouting that “it had to be done” and he “did what he had to do” and he “saved them”. He won’t stop. And I’m scared and I want to runaway. I don’t want to see him like this and I want to stop him from yelling at mama like that. But I can’t get my feet to move. I can’t get my eyes to look away,” remembers Andrew. 

“Then what?” asks Claire. 

“Then Carina comes and taps me on the shoulder. I’m startled because I never saw her come down the hallway,” responds Andrew. 

“Does she say anything?” says Claire. 

“Yes. She says, “Andrea everything is going to be okay. Get back in bed,” and then she tucks me back in bed and places headphones on my ears and plays some music so I can’t hear him yelling anymore. And she shuts the blinds so I can’t see the lights anymore and eventually I fall asleep,” says Andrew. 

“Is it over?” asks Claire. 

“Why do we have to do this? I’m done with this. I don’t want to do it anymore,” shouts Andrew. 

“Because you need to understand what bipolar disorder does and how to control it for yourself. You need to understand your father’s actions were not his fault, just like your’s aren’t your fault either. In order to relive your manic episode, you need to relive his,” explains Claire. 

“No, I didn’t have an episode okay. I’m not bipolar. I’m not him. I didn’t do anything like him,” defends Andrew. 

“But you did. You could have easily as killed Suzanne as you saved her. You could have easily killed yourself in that blizzard as you made it back just in the nick of time. That is not okay and knowing something is wrong and refusing to do anything about it, IS your fault. You say you don’t want to be like your father, yet you refuse to come to terms with your illness, just like him,” antagonizes Claire. 

“I’m done with this. You know nothing about me or my father,” rejects Andrew. 

Andrew immediately leaves Claire’s office. He’s angry at her but he’s in more pain for all of the memories he has just had to relive. He just wants to forget everything. He doesn’t want to feel like this anymore. He needs her. She makes it all go away. He always feels so safe with her. He goes to her office and just hopes she’s there. 

“Hey, what are you doing here?” asks Meredith. 

Andrew locks the door behind him and takes off his shirt. 

“Andrew, what are you doing?” questions a confused Meredith. 

Andrew doesn’t respond with words. He un-does the zipper to his jeans and pulls them down. His shoes and underwear all follow next, until he is completely naked in front of her desk. Meredith gets up from her seat and stands in front of him. She does everything in her power to keep desire away. 

“Andrew, no. We can’t. Not right now,” whispers Meredith. 

“Meredith, per favore. Ho bisogno di te (Please, I need you),” pleads Andrew. 

Andrew can see a moral war playing out in Meredith’s head. 

“It’s okay, please. Togli il mio dolore (take my pain away),” begs Andrew once more. 

Finally, Meredith gives in. She pulls her scrub top over her head and removes her pants. Her bra and underwear find themselves gone from her body as well. Andrew thanks her in a desperate kiss. She can tell just by the way he kisses and the way his hands can’t decide what part of her body they want to touch, that he really does need her. If he needs to forget and feel no pain just for a little while, she can help with that. 

His muscled body lifts her’s with ease and places her on the desk. His lips find themselves everywhere. Her lips, her neck, her breasts, her warmth, everywhere. He wants to forget the world exists and just get lost in the curves of her beautiful body. And finally, after weeks of separation, their bodies come together to form one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! So wow! The world has literally fallen apart since I've last posted. Hope you all stay safe from the virus. But can we just take a moment to applaud Giacomo's acting right now? He is killing it on Grey's and I wish he had more screen time! Him as an actor and Andrew as a character have grown so much in the past 2 years. Also, I am still annoyed that it seems as if Meredith, like doesn't care? I'm just blaming that on Alex not being there to talk to. But one moment you see the love she has for Andrew and the next it's like she forgot he exists?! I don't know what the writers are doing with them, but I hope it involves them getting through this together at some point. And the merwidow shippers (literally the worst ship name ever) are completely denying that Andrew has a mental illness which is very annoying. Like no, Meredith isn't going to leave the man she loves who is sick and run off into the sunset with some random Irish guy that appeared out of nowhere! Anyway, rant over hope you enjoyed this chapter :)


	6. Only been here for a moment, but I know I want you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew makes a decision about therapy, while Meredith receives life changing news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter picks right up after the last one ended. Enjoy! :)

“Andrew?” asked Meredith in a whisper. 

“Hmm?” responded Andrew. 

Meredith had been debating for several minutes of when to ask him what was wrong. She knew he had a therapy session today and it must have been awful if he burst into her office in the afternoon and practically begged for sex. She didn’t want to ruin their perfect moment with her laying on his chest, drawing circles on his pecks and him stroking her hair all while still both naked lying on her office couch, but she needed to make sure he was okay and not burying his feelings again. 

“Not that I don’t love the afternoon sex, because I do lets do it all the time I say, but what’s wrong? You seemed so upset when you walked in,” said Meredith as sweetly as possible. 

“Nothings wrong,” deflected Andrew by placing a kiss on the top of her head. 

“Andrew, come on. I just got you back,” stated Meredith as she re-adjusted to face him, “I don’t want to lose you again. What’s wrong?”

“Tough session. Dr. Meyers had me relive the night my father killed those four people. It’s been a long time since I remembered that, I mean really remembered it. In full detail,” revealed Andrew. 

“I’m sorry,” responded Meredith. 

Meredith placed a trail of kisses from his pecks to his neck to his jaw and finally finding his lips. Truth is, she didn’t know what to say to him right now. There were no words so all she could do was show him she loves him and she is here. 

“Mer, I don’t want to be like him,” admitted Andrew with tears welling in his eyes. 

“I know. You have no idea how much I know. This is the hardest part Andrew, coming to terms with it. But you don’t have to be like him, you can be better. You can be a great surgeon and a great person just by accepting help. You’re taking responsibility Andrew, that is something he has never done and might not ever do,” comforted Meredith. 

“I just feel really ashamed for everything I’ve done. I could have killed someone Mer. And I hurt you. I said horrible things to you and I am so sorry,” apologized Andrew. 

“Listen to me, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You weren’t in control. Its not your fault, I understand that. You’re sick, stop beating yourself up over it. I forgive you Andrew, I know you didn’t mean to say those things to me. I have no doubt in my mind, that in the right state of mind, you could never hurt me. You are the sweetest and most loving person I have ever met,” stated Meredith. 

“I love you,” said Andrew. 

“And I love you. You’re going to get through this. We’re going to get through it together,” promised Meredith. 

Andrew shook his head in agreement. 

“Will you go back to therapy?” asked Meredith. 

“Yes,” agreed Andrew. 

Meredith’s words were just the motivation Andrew was looking for. The next day, he attended therapy just as scheduled and continued to work on himself. And while Andrew was consumed with therapy, Meredith was going through something herself. The tell-tale sign was the cafeteria’s soup of the day. 

At lunch, Meredith started to feel a little sick. At first, she thought it was something in her food, until she realized it was the smell. She sat there for minutes trying to figure it out, until the smell overwhelmed her too much and she had to leave. Meredith immediately bolted to the bathroom where she threw up. Finally, Meredith put it together. The soup of the day included bacon and Meredith absolutely could not stand the smell of bacon when she was pregnant. 

Meredith racked her brain to if that was even possible. She had sworn to herself after Ellis was born, she would not be having anymore kids. It made sense then, Derek was gone so there was no one to procreate with anyway. Besides, both Bailey and Ellis’s pregnancies were extremely difficult on her body and she nearly died both times she delivered. Then there was the fact she had a hostile uterus. Meredith couldn’t really be pregnant, could she? She had gotten back on birth control over a year ago when she started dating Andrew and swore she never missed a pill. 

But the bacon. And the smell of surgery had been bothering her a lot lately. After years of being in the OR, she had become immune to the horrible smell of it except when she was pregnant. Getting pregnant while on the pill wasn’t an impossible thing to happen, seeing as she happened to get pregnant each time while still on it. She has a busy work schedule and a busy life, so sometimes she misses a day or two and boom welcome to the world Bailey and Ellis. After Andrew had broken up with Meredith after her trial, she wasn’t too concerned with taking the pill. Irresponsible yes, but she didn’t think she would be having sex anytime soon. But then Andrew came over that one night and he was stressed and she had been really missing him, next thing she knows they are naked and in her bed. 

So yes in fact, Meredith could be pregnant. There was only one way to find out. She took a pregnancy test from the supply closet and waited till she got home. She spent the evening with her children and stressing. They went to bed and Meredith decided to get her question answered. It seemed like forever until that test was ready. Meredith took a deep breath, picked up the test on her bathroom counter, and looked at it. 

Positive. 

She is pregnant. 

Meredith gasped and just stared at the test. She honestly had no idea how to feel. Meredith was certain she was done with this part of her life, she never wanted anymore kids. Even when things were great with Andrew she didn’t want anymore. Babies and kids are amazing, but they are a lot. And it’s especially hard when you have to do everything by yourself. She also felt a little guilty. Marriage, kids, and a happily ever after was all supposed to belong to Derek. It felt a little wrong that this baby wasn’t Derek’s. And the guilt she felt for hurting Derek, made her feel even guiltier about Andrew. 

Her sweet, kind, selfless, and sensitive Andrew. She should be so lucky to be loved by him and create a life with him. He had always given her everything, she should give that as well. 

Meredith thought about the baby some more. Things with Andrew at the moment are anything but perfect and the timing is so wrong, but realistically if they were to have a baby together in this way, it’s kind of now or never. Meredith has a history of struggling to keep a pregnancy and her age now would only make that harder. In just a few years, it would be next to impossible to get pregnant. And she does love Andrew, so much more than she thought she ever could. Andrew is so good already with her kids, he’s even Ellis’s most favorite person. Meredith’s stint in jail proved to her that he could play a paternal role in their lives. And she knew he would be so happy to have a baby with her. 

Also, there was the fact that Andrew’s hazel eyes and curly hair would look so cute on a baby. Just picturing that baby and Andrew with that baby, made Meredith want to meet that baby too. 

Meredith would be lying if she didn’t want that future again. Nothing beat coming home after a long day of surgery to seeing Derek have a tea-party with Zola and holding baby Bailey. Those days when they shared milestones together, had each other to hold during the long nights, and those early mornings when little tiny feet would jump on their bed and wake them up were the best of her life. And she wanted that again. She wanted the feeling of family. 

She never had it growing up and when she finally made a family of her own, she was so happy. The kids still make her happy of course, but it’s just not the same when you go to look over your shoulder to experience the moment with, and no one is there. 

Andrew had did his best to make it clear to her kids that he didn’t want to replace their father, but would be more than happy to step in when they needed him to. And Andrew deserves to be a father. He does so much for her kids already and he should have someone there that belongs to him and calls him dad. 

They could have a future. And Meredith wants that future. She’s finally starting to trust the idea of forever again. 

With all of these thoughts running through Meredith’s head, she goes in front of her mirror in her bedroom and lifts up her shirt. She places her hands over the tiny life her and Andrew created and just smiles. 

This baby would be just like Andrew and Meredith’s entire relationship; surprising, unexpected, hectic, and so-so beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Merluca baby on the way!!! I thought everyone could use some cheering up during this coronavirus pandemic.


	7. Well I've been on fire, dreaming of you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meredith reveals her surprising news to Andrew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we get started, I just joined twitter! So if you're interested in following me, my account name is the same as on here; mimanchiandrea. I post updates about when I'm posting as well as other Merluca related content. Hope you enjoy this chapter, it is nothing but pure, sweet, and old fashioned Merluca.

Meredith had no idea how she wanted to tell Andrew about the baby. Learning you are having your first and possibly only child, should be special right? Andrew was going to be at her place any minute and she still didn’t have a plan on how to do it. While internally freaking out on the couch, Meredith heard Andrew knock on the door. 

“Hey,” greeted Meredith. 

“Hi,” responded Andrew. Andrew gave Meredith a quick kiss and stepped inside. 

“I missed you,” said Andrew. 

“Me too,” replied Meredith, going to give him another kiss. 

“Therapy went well and has been improving quite a bit. Dr. Meyers put me on this new medication that’s supposed to regulate everything,” revealed Andrew. 

“That’s great! See, I told you, everything is going to get better,” encouraged Meredith. 

“Yeah, I guess. I still just don’t feel totally like myself,” sighed Andrew. 

“I know, all of this is a lot to process, but I have some news that I think might cheer you up,” hinted Meredith. 

“Really? What might that be?” questioned Andrew. 

“Well come over here and open this,” responded Meredith. 

Meredith handed Andrew a tiny box that a necklace once came in. Andrew opened the box and was confused at first until he realized it was a pregnancy test. Then he made a shocked face, followed by a smile, and then looked at her with tears welling in his eyes. 

“You’re pregnant?” asked Andrew in a whisper. 

“Yeah, I just found out. I’m not exactly sure how far along I am, but yeah I’m pregnant,” stated Meredith. 

“We’re having a baby?” asked Andrew in astonishment. 

“Yeah, we’re having a baby,” announced Meredith. 

Andrew immediately stepped towards Meredith and gave her a loving kiss. Then he lifted her and spun her around. 

“We’re having a baby,” reiterated Andrew. 

Meredith knew how much Carina was worried about Andrew, but he still seemed so hesitant to let her know what was happening with him. Meredith thinks its because Carina is the one who told her that he might be ill and thinks Andrew might feel slightly betrayed, even though she was just trying to help him. She knew Andrew needed all the support he could get right now, so she made a step to repair their relationship. They decided Carina would be the first to know about the baby and be their OB. Andrew was defensive at first, saying how he wanted to keep this between them for now, but Meredith explained that she didn’t want some random OB telling everybody their business and that Carina was the best and should be the one to take care of their child. Andrew reluctantly agreed. Meredith made an appointment with Carina saying it was just for a regular gynecology check up, when in actuality they were going to tell her the news and have her perform an ultrasound. 

“Hello Mere- Oh Andrew I didn’t know you were coming. Significant others don’t usually come to these appointments,” greeted Carina in surprise. 

“Well, that was a slight fib. I do need an appointment, just a different kind and we wanted to tell you in person,” explained Meredith. 

“Tell me what?” questioned Carina. 

Meredith waited for Andrew to answer her and when he didn’t, she nudged him.

“Meredith and I are having a baby,” revealed Andrew. 

“Wait! What? You’re pregnant?” asked Carina in confusion. 

“Yeah, surprise!” said Meredith. 

“How can you two even have a baby right now? Andrea, with everything going on with you, are you sure your ready to be a father?” worried Carina. 

“See, I told you Mer, she was just going to judge us. Why can’t you just let me be happy without having to constantly remind me I’m crazy,” stated a growing with anger Andrew. 

“Andrew, calm down. You’re not crazy, stop saying that. Carina is just worried about you, she loves you. Carina, we know that the timing is not the best right now, but Andrew has been working really hard on himself in therapy and if I didn’t think he was ready for this we wouldn’t be here right now. We wanted you to be the first to know because we want you to be our OB,” calmed Meredith. 

“Andrea, I don’t think you're crazy. I just want to make sure you're okay. I’m happy for you, honestly. Of course I will be the OB to my little niece or nephew. It would be the greatest honor to deliver my only brother’s baby,” agreed Carina. 

“Thank you Carina, that means a lot. And I’m sorry too, for pushing you away. I know this must be hard for you,” apologized Andrew. 

“Go hug your sister,” interjected Meredith. 

Carina and Andrew hugged and then Carina got started. First, Meredith had to answer some questions and fill out paperwork. Then Carina did some blood work, that all came out healthy and they finally started the ultrasound. Meredith removed her pants, got on the table and lifted her shirt past her stomach. Carina applied gel, got out her doppler, and then turned on the screen. 

“There’s your baby,” stated Carina, pointing to the screen. 

“Wow. Mer, we made that,” beamed Andrew. 

Meredith went back and forth between smiling at the screen and smiling at Andrew who looked so happy for he first time in what seemed like forever. 

“The fetus is about seven weeks and seems to be growing strong. It still might be a little bit too early, but I can try and find the heartbeat if you would like,” said Carina. 

“Yes please,” agreed Meredith. 

It took Carina a minute, but she found it. Their beautiful baby had a strong heartbeat. 

“Oh my God, that’s the most amazing this I’ve ever heard,” stated Andrew. 

“Hey,” whispered Meredith, just to Andrew. 

“Hi,” whispered Andrew back. 

They smiled at each other and got lost in each other’s eyes for a second, then exchanged a sweet chaste kiss all while holding hands. Once their private moment past, they placed their eyes back on the screen and took in the joy of seeing their child for the first time. Eventually, Carina stopped the ultrasound and they got everything ready for future appointments and discussed all of the prenatals Meredith needs to take. 

“Thanks again Carina,” said Meredith as she left the room. 

“Of course, hey Andrea. Can you stay a minute please?” asked Carina. 

“Yeah, what’s up?” responded Andrew. 

“Congratulazioni Andrea, sono cosi felice per te (Congratulations Andrew, I am so happy for you),” congratulated Carina. 

“Grazie, di tutto sorella maggiore (Thank you, for everything big sister),” replied Andrew. 

Later that night, Andrew and Meredith lay in Meredith’s bed snuggled tightly together. Andrew spooned Meredith and looked over her shoulder to see the ultrasound picture of their baby. 

“I think it has your nose,” observed Andrew. 

“The baby is seven weeks, how do you even see any features? All ultrasounds look the same,” laughed Meredith. 

“No, not ours’. Ours’ is different,” responded Andrew. 

“How so?” asked Meredith. 

“Because ours is perfect,” answered Andrew in the most serious tone. 

“Oh, well when you put it like that I have to agree. But what about Zola, Bailey, and Ellis? Well I never did get one of Zola but-,” said Meredith. 

“They’re perfect too. Anything that comes from you is perfect,” explained Andrew. 

“I love you,” replied Meredith. 

“I don’t think I can ever get tired of hearing you say that,” said Andrew. 

“Well good because you’ll be hearing it for the rest of your life,” flirted Meredith. 

“Sounds just perfect,” beamed Andrew. 

“You know what sounds really perfect right now?” hinted Meredith. 

“What?” asked Andrew. 

“If we both got naked,” offered Meredith. 

“Oh that does sound perfect. Anything for the mother of my child,” responded Andrew. 

Meredith giggled as Andrew immediately took off his shirt and got on top of her. God, did Andrew love to hear her adorable laugh. It was a perfect beginning to a perfect life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to take a moment to apologize to Queen Krista Vernoff about earlier comments. I'm so happy about Merluca in the last episode, Meredith finally opened up and for the first time in a very long time, I have hope for them. Of course the haters have tried to dissect the scene into something its not, but it doesn't matter, Merluca stans we keep winning and that's the tea! Giacomo's acting was some of the best I have ever seen on the show and the storyline feels like old amazing Grey's days. Andrew needs the biggest hug and apology in the world. He better be okay on that motorcycle!


	8. There's nothing I won't do to see you shine.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut and fluff. Lol, yeah that's all this chapter is.

Following their baby news, routine therapy sessions, and new meds; Andrew’s mood had improved greatly. Andrew started to finally feel like his old self again, but his co-workers didn’t treat him that way. His residents that he was supposed to be Chief of didn’t respect him anymore and his attendings were so weird around him. They never trusted him to do procedures alone and treated him as if he was a junior resident. Everyone saw his behavior. Everyone knew Chief Bailey ordered him to receive counseling before being allowed to operate again. Everyone treated him like a bomb that was about to explode. He felt so self-conscious and embarrassed that everyone knew that he is bipolar and saw him lash out at several of his co-workers, including his girlfriend. Andrew is in his fifth year and is preparing to take his boards this summer, he needs better procedures and to find a specialty. 

Meredith knew how stressed and down Andrew was about work, so she came up with an idea to cheer him up. Knowing that very soon they would be outnumbered and very busy with four kids, she suggested a little weekend getaway for just the two of them. Sort of like a baby moon but just a tiny bit early in the pregnancy, partly because of Andrew’s feelings and partly because of Meredith’s insane hormones. In all her pregnancies, she has had very similar symptoms. The same cravings, the same time of morning sickness, the same things that made her nauseous, the same sobbing when she was angry, and most of all the same feeling of needing sex. All the time. It was seriously a problem. She felt bad for not requesting Andrew on her service, but every time she saw him it took every ounce of strength in her body not to jump him in front of everyone. So, Meredith needed this weekend with no kids, sisters, or work interrupting them, just as much as he did. 

They decided to leave Friday night after the kids went to sleep to reduce their time away from them as much as possible. The drive only took them a little bit under two hours to get to an Airbnb in a private wooded area. The house had beautiful open windows along the back so you could see all the nature. It had a very cozy feeling with a fireplace, enormous bathtub, and a huge bed. The house also featured a walk-in shower, a furnished kitchen, and a game room. 

“This place is amazing,” said Andrew. 

“I thought so too when I picked it out and it even has a bathtub,” observed Meredith. 

“Oh I know how you love your bubble baths. Too bad you can’t have any wine with it though,” responded Andrew. 

“That’s okay, I have something much better that can accompany me in the bath,” said Meredith. 

“What’s that?” asked Andrew, knowing where this is going. 

“Well you of course,” replied Meredith.

Meredith and Andrew placed their bags in their room and got their bath ready. Meredith ran the bath with bubbles, while Andrew lit candles around the bathroom. They both undressed to nothing, then Andrew got in first and held Meredith’s hand to guide her in as well. Meredith snuggled into Andrew, with her back touching his front. Andrew laid his head on her shoulder as Meredith rest her head against his chest and cheek. Andrew’s arms immediately wrapped around Meredith’s front, with his hands finding her womb that had not begun to show yet. He didn’t tell her this, but he is so excited to see her belly get all swollen. He had seen pictures of her pregnant in the past and could not wait to see it in person. Andrew was so excited to feel their baby move and wait on Meredith. Whether that be rubbing her feet and back after a long day at work or fetching her whatever craving she was having. 

“This is nice,” sighed Meredith. 

“Mmm,” hummed Andrew in response as he placed a kiss on her shoulder and neck. 

They stayed cuddled like that for a few minutes before Andrew decided to heat things up a bit. He knew exactly why Meredith suggested they have a bath together and knew her hormones were driving her insane. 

Andrew began his seduction by placing lasting kisses from her shoulder to her neck. There is nothing that Meredith Grey loves more than neck kisses, so his lips spent extra time there as she began to quietly moan in satisfaction. Next, Andrew removed his hands from her womb and began to rub her thighs and breasts, as he continued to kiss her neck. His hands and lips traveled to all the places they could go. Andrew could tell by the sounds she was making and the way she bit her lip, that Meredith was aroused and finally, he placed his fingers where they were really needed. 

He started with just one finger and slipped it into her slick vagina. Meredith leaned back in response and let out a whimper. Andrew added two more fingers to the mix, teasing her insistently before finally finding her clit. Meredith responded to the touching of her clit by grabbing the sides of the tub and moaning louder. 

“That feels so good, don’t stop,” begged Meredith.

“Venire per me (come for me),” whispered Andrew. 

“Make me,” antagonized Meredith. 

Andrew responded by becoming more forceful with his fingers, adding tongue to his kisses on her neck and ears, and using his free hand to massage her sensitive breasts. Meredith began moaning even louder to his added pressure and bucked her hips as she started to unravel. Her arm snaked around Andrew’s neck as her hand got lost in Andrew’s hair. Meredith jerked her head back, held on tight to Andrew’s hair, and cried so loud as she let the orgasm wave wash over her. 

Meredith slowly came down from her high, panting in the process. Andrew snuggled her tightly and placed quick kisses wherever he could reach as she came back down to earth. 

“Baciami (kiss me),” uttered Meredith, finally able to speak. 

Meredith turned her head to face him so he could reach her lips. The kiss quickly became a make out session as Meredith adjusted herself so that she was straddling him in the tub. Andrew’s hands gripped Meredith’s hips and ass. Meredith returned the favor of earlier as her tongue and lips explored Andrew’s chest, neck, mouth, and ear. 

“You’re rock hard,” observed Meredith. 

“Mmm hmm. Can we move to the bed? I wanna fill you all the way up,” suggested Andrew. 

“Absolutely,” agreed Meredith. 

Meredith slid back from Andrew so he could get up and then she. Before she could step out, Andrew grabbed her thighs and lifted her so that she was in the same position as before, just standing. Meredith continued kissed Andrew as he carried them to the bed, just a few feet away. Andrew gently placed Meredith on the bed and hovered over her. They continued kissing until the need to feel each other became too much. 

“You ready?” asked Andrew. 

Meredith just responded by shaking her head yes. Andrew wasted no time as he entered her. Slowly at first, so she could adjust to his length. Andrew moaned as soon as she surrounded him. His thrusts were slow and gentle at first. He buried his head in her neck as she massaged his back and hips with one hand and the other dug into his thick curly hair. Andrew moved his lips so that he could take her nipples into his mouth. Meredith sighed to the feeling of his tongue and teeth around her boobs. Soon, both were needing more pressure. 

“Deeper,” demanded Meredith. 

Andrew fit all of himself into her and picked up his pace until they found a good rhythm. Both of their groans became louder and more pleading. 

“You’re so beautiful,” muttered Andrew. 

“Harder, please,” pleaded Meredith. 

Their movements became less passionate and more rough and quick to finish them both off. Meredith came undone once more, as her back arched. Andrew held off for as long as he could so she could finish, until his own need to finish overcame him. He began to pound into her profusely until he spilt into her, letting out a loud groan as he collapsed onto her, once again burying his head in the crook of her neck. While they came out of ecstasy, they held onto each other. They stayed like that for what felt like minutes before Andrew kissed Meredith lovingly, pulled out, and rolled onto his back beside her. Meredith missed the loss of him inside of her already once he left. They each lay on their backs panting for a moment, before Meredith rolled to her side and Andrew lifted his arm so she could snuggle into him. Andrew kissed the top of her head as she got settled. 

“Thank you,” whispered Meredith. 

“Right back at you,” responded Andrew. 

The couples’ weekend continued just as it started. They found themselves having sex in every corner of their rented house. The couch, the shower, the bathtub, the bed, the kitchen counter, the kitchen table, on the pool table in the game room, on the deck, and in front of the fireplace. 

Before they left, they sat on the porch watching the sun come up. They assumed their same positions as the bathtub, only this time fully clothed. Andrew placed his hands on Meredith’s belly once more and massaged the area. 

“I can’t wait to meet our baby. I already love them so much,” stated Andrew. 

“Yeah, me too. October can’t come fast enough,” smiled Meredith. 

“Mer, if its alright with you, I don’t want to find out the sex of the baby until they’re born,” suggested Andrew. 

“You sure? It is very hard to wait,” asks Meredith. 

“Yeah, I don’t know I just like the idea of Carina announcing right after you deliver. I think it’s special and in today’s world the gender doesn’t even really matter that much,” answers Andrew.

“I think that’s a great idea. And you know, my first trimester is finally over, we should probably tell the kids,” revealed Meredith. 

“Really?” asked an excited Andrew. 

“Yep. I was thinking as soon as we got home,” said Meredith. 

Ever since he found out, Andrew had been pestering her to tell the kids. He was just so excited and loves her kids so much, he wanted to share the joy. She could tell he had been bonding with them even more lately and this new baby not only makes him officially a father but cements himself into her kids’ lives as well. Andrew knew he could never replace their father and take that title of “dad” away from Derek, but he loved them so much and wanted more than to be their mom’s boyfriend. It was still too early for marriage, but in a very backwards way this was getting him one step closer to being Meredith Grey’s husband and Zola, Bailey, and Ellis’s stepfather. Which is a role he would take with just as much pride as being his child’s actual father. 

“Can we talk about baby names?” asked Andrew. 

“You don’t want to know the sex but you want to pick a name already?” joked Meredith. 

“Well I have a name already that I really want to use if the baby happens to be a girl,” explained Andrew. 

“Okay, what is it?” questioned Meredith. 

“Elena. It was my mother’s name and she means so much to me and I miss her so much. I just really want to honor her if possible,” says Andrew. 

“That’s a beautiful name Andrew, I love it. You have any boy names?” replies Meredith. 

“Now there, I have no idea. But I was hoping we could use an Italian name? It’s really important to me to pay tribute to where I’m from,” responds Andrew. 

“Of course we can do that. Now for the last name, I already have one. DeLuca,” states Meredith. 

“We’re not married, you sure you don’t want to hyphenate it?” asks Andrew. 

“I’m sure. I like your last name and what it means to you. Also hyphenated names are too much of a mouthful for a surgeon. Dr. Grey-DeLuca? Way too long,” explains Meredith. 

Andrew laughed in response and kissed Meredith’s cheek. The two snuggled tighter and continued to watch the sun come up in silence before starting their journey home, just enjoying each other’s presence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed, more is coming soon but not that much more. I don't see this story extending much longer and may feature some time jumps, but don't worry I do have other Merluca fanfictions in the works. I have an idea to re-work a previous storyline of Meredith's to include her relationship with Andrew so look forward to that and the rest of I'm With You. Hope you all are staying safe, happy, and healthy!


	9. The way it came tumbling down just like a waterfall.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew gets a lesson in being a stepfather, while Meredith is busy with pro-bono surgery day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important to note that this chapter features a time jump, we jump ahead quite a bit into Meredith's pregnancy.

“Alright come sit down on the couch,” ordered Meredith to her three kids. 

Andrew and Meredith were about to tell the kids about their new baby sibling. 

“How was your trip mommy?” asked Zola. 

“It was fun ZoZo, but we missed all of you. Andrew and I want to tell you all something,” said Meredith. 

“Are we getting a dog?” asked Bailey. 

Bailey had been insistent on getting a dog since Zola’s science experiment. 

“Not yet Bailey. But something new will be joining the family. I’m going to have another baby,” announced Meredith. 

“A baby? Like Auntie Amelia had a baby?” questioned Bailey. 

“Just like that Bailey,” responded Meredith. 

“Where’s the baby mama?” asked a confused Ellis. 

“It’s in your mommy’s belly El,” answered Andrew. 

“Did you eat it?” responded Ellis. 

“No sweet girl. Before the baby comes into the world, it has to live in mommy’s tummy. Then when it’s ready to come, mommy will give birth to it,” explained Meredith. 

“When’s the baby gonna come home?” questioned Bailey. 

“Not for another six months buddy,” responded Andrew. 

“Are you guys excited to have a new baby sibling?” asked Meredith. 

“I am! I hope I have a baby brother,” squealed Bailey. 

“I am, I want another sissy,” said Ellis. 

“You’re being very quiet over there Zola. Are you excited?” asked Meredith. 

“Does this baby not have the same daddy as us?” questioned Zola in a whisper. 

“Andrew is this baby’s dad,” answered Meredith. 

Zola immediately ran upstairs to her room after Meredith answered her question. It always seemed like Andrew was one step forward with Zola and then five steps back. Every time he got just a little bit closer with Zola, something would happen and she would despise him again. It had been like that ever since he started dating Meredith. Ellis fell in love with him right off the bat, Bailey liked having another boy around but he didn’t really care about who was with his mom, and Zola was always hot and cold. 

One minute, Andrew would help Zola with her homework and the next she was refusing to eat his dinner. One minute, Zola would want Andrew to play with her and then the next she was throwing a fit about him spending the night. He could never figure out where he stood with her and it was so frustrating. Andrew just wanted her to know that he was not taking her dad’s place, but he also knew that wasn’t what she was really angry about. It wasn’t that Zola didn’t like Andrew, because she did, it was that him being there meant her dad never would be. It was a living reminder that her dad died, way before a child should ever have to lose a parent. So, Andrew didn’t get his feelings hurt when she was icy and he remained calm when she threw the dinner he made on the ground. This was part of being a stepdad. Sometimes you are needed to fill in as dad and sometimes you are needed for them to get their hurt and anger taken out on. 

Meredith and Andrew made eye contact and sighed. 

“I am going to go talk to her,” says Meredith breaking the silence. 

“I think we both should, if that’s alright. I think we both need to explain,” suggested Andrew. 

Meredith shook her head in agreement. They put on a show for Bailey and Ellis, then headed up to Zola’s room. Meredith knocked on the door.

“Zo, can mommy and Andrew come in?” asked Meredith. 

“No! Go away! I hate you,” yelled Zola, clearly in tears. 

“Zola, please let us come in. Let’s talk about this,” begged Meredith. 

Just then, the door creaked open and Zola ran back to her bed with her head buried in the pillow. 

“Tell us why you’re mad,” said Meredith. 

“How can you have a baby with someone that’s not daddy? You’re creating a new family and you’re gonna forget all about us,” cried Zola. 

“ZoZo that’s not true. I’m making the family bigger, not creating a new one,” explained Meredith. 

“Do you not love daddy anymore?” worried Zola. 

“What? Of course I love your dad, I will always love your dad,” confirmed Meredith. 

“How can you still love daddy and have a baby with Andrew?” questioned Zola. 

She had sat up and was now facing them.

“Zola, your mom will always love your dad. And he will always be apart of the family. Just because your mom and I are together, does not mean we are trying to replace him. That’s impossible, you know that. It’s okay to be mad at me Zola for being here, while he’s not. And it’s okay to like me for being here, while he’s not. I am so sorry you lost your dad Zola, it’s not fair. But your mom lost him too. And she misses him everyday and will always miss him. But it’s okay for her to move on and be happy, just like it’s okay for you to do so as well. This baby is a good thing Zola. It’s a sign of happiness and hope. Just because I am joining the family and this baby is joining the family, it does not mean your dad is forgotten. He will always be in your heart Zola, nothing will ever change that,” reassured Andrew. 

“Promise?” stated Zola. 

“I promise,” agreed Andrew. 

Zola sniffled her nose and rubbed the tears out her eyes, then she scooted closer to Andrew and hugged him. In their difficult relationship, Zola had never hugged Andrew until just now, not even the days she liked him. Andrew remembered the first time each of the kids hugged him. Ellis was first of course. Andrew came to Meredith’s house late one day after work and Ellis ran straight to the door and jumped in his arms. Bailey hugged him for the first time after he fell off of his bike. Andrew put a band aid on it and Bailey was trying not to cry. Andrew sang him an Italian lullaby his mother used to sing to him when he got hurt. It was silly and sounded funny to a child. It always distracted him from what was wrong and made him smile, it did the same for Bailey. And after Andrew cleaned the wound and placed the band-aid, Bailey gave him a hug and got right back on the bike. Those hugs were so special and made Andrew feel a different kind of love that he had never felt before. A paternal love. But as amazing as those hugs were, they were not nearly as rewarding as finally receiving a hug from Zola. 

Andrew made eye contact with Meredith as Zola hugged him. He was surprised at first and then smiled so big with tears in his eyes. Meredith felt tears forming in her eyes as well. The hug lasted for a moment longer until Zola pulled away. 

“Mommy how did the baby get in your tummy? How did you make it?” questioned Zola, back to her curious self. 

The best part about having children close together while they are still toddlers is that they don’t question the new baby’s existence. One day they’re just chilling in their own little worlds and then out of nowhere they have a sibling. They don’t question it and when they do, it’s very easy to give them some made-up answer that makes zero sense and they accept it. But Zola’s not little anymore and it was only a matter of time before she learned the truth. Meredith knew she was going to have to have this conversation within the next year and half anyway. 

“Andrew can you give us some time alone to talk?” asked Meredith. 

Andrew shook his head yes and went downstairs to play with the younger Shepherd siblings. Twenty minutes had passed when all of a sudden, he heard Zola yell from upstairs. 

“Ew!” shouted Zola. 

Time continued to pass in the pregnancy. All three kids were excited about their new baby siblings as well as the rest of their family and co-workers. Amelia had moved in with Link after her child was born months ago and Maggie decided to move out too. Both sisters had moved in with Meredith to help her get back on her feet and she was finally happy again. Maggie also just felt strange living with such a houseful of people and needed the space. She decided to get a nice apartment more in the city that was much more her speed. Andrew gave up his lease and moved in with Meredith. 

The attic that once belonged to Lexie and then was transformed into an actual bedroom for Maggie, became Zola and Ellis’s room. While Bailey kept his room on the same floor as Meredith’s and the free room on that floor became the nursery. With Andrew’s love for the stars, the nursery took on that theme with neutral colors. 

Meredith continued her work on pro-bono surgeries and was able to make that a monthly occasion. One day she hoped to make it an everyday thing, but for right now she settled with what she could get. Work improved for Andrew as well and he finally decided on a specialty. Pediatrics. For awhile he thought General Surgery, but he just loved working with kids more. And pediatrics a lot of the time involved similar cases to general, just with tiny humans. Andrew’s mental health had improved greatly. He attended weekly therapy sessions and was doing so well his medication had changed to lower doses. 

Everything was going perfect. The key word there being, was. Meredith had felt tight pains in her lower abdomen and back all day. She ignored it as Braxton Hicks and from working all day. This particular day of pro-bono surgeries had been extremely stressful. Everything that could go wrong, went wrong. Meredith couldn’t remember the last time she ate or drank anything, let alone slept. Andrew had been busy in surgeries all day and he’s usually the one who makes her take a break. Soon the pain became unbearable and Meredith knew exactly what was wrong. Meredith is in labor, but she’s only twenty-six weeks pregnant. Meredith made it to Carina’s floor and found her. 

“Carina, something’s wrong. I-I think I’m labor,” revealed Meredith.

As she said that, Meredith buckled in pain and if Carina hadn’t had been there, she would have fallen over. 

“Can I get a wheelchair over here?” demanded Carina.


	10. And my heart ran away from me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carina works to save the baby.

“Meredith, I know it hurts but I need you to calm down. I need you to breathe, the baby’s heart rate is rising rapidly,” commanded Carina. 

Meredith had been moved into her own room and she was practically screaming in pain. She had experienced labor pain before, but this felt so much worse. The slow progression of labor had been accelerated and so had the pain that went along with it. 

“Where’s Andrew?” winced Meredith. 

“I paged him, he’ll be here soon. But Meredith I need you to breathe, I know it hurts but please relax for me,” begged Carina. 

“Carina what’s happening? It’s too early,” cried Meredith. 

“I know, please Meredith, please just calm down,” said Carina again. 

Both Meredith and the baby’s heartrates were accelerating at a dangerous pace. Carina needed Meredith to relax so her body would calm down and finally the baby’s heart would slow down too. Meredith did her best, but the pain was unbearable and the panic of something being wrong with baby was too much. Carina tried attaching an oxygen mask and continuing to coax Meredith, but nothing was working. 

“What’s wrong?” worried Andrew, bursting into the door. 

“Meredith is going into preterm labor. I think I can stop it, but Meredith won’t calm down and its overwhelming the baby,” explained Carina. 

Andrew ran to Meredith’s side and began rubbing and kissing her forehead. 

“Hey, look at me. I need you to breathe for our baby. Everything is going to be okay, Carina can fix this. Please Meredith, just breathe,” calmed Andrew. 

Meredith focused on Andrew’s eyes rather than her pain. Her breathing slowed to a healthy pace and her heartrate followed. 

“What if we lose the baby?” asked Meredith barely above a whisper. 

“We won’t. You know how I know that? Because my sister is really good at her job and because this baby has the strongest and bravest person for a mother in the whole world. Fight the pain Mer and just breathe. Everything is going to be okay. This baby is strong,” answered Andrew. 

Andrew got into the bed with Meredith and held her through the pain. He continuously rubbed her back and kissed her forehead. Carina attached a drip to Meredith’s IV in hopes to stop the labor. Within about twenty minutes of the drip being placed, the contractions came to a halt. 

“I think the labor is stopped for good, but I would like to monitor you for the next few days to be sure. But after that, I am recommending strict bed rest until the baby comes. You overworked yourself today Meredith and if you don’t take my advice, this baby will come way too early,” explained Carina. 

Meredith shook her head that she understood. Carina then left Meredith and Andrew alone in the room. 

“What happened today Mer?” Andrew asked calmly. 

“The waiting room was packed and there were doctors that canceled last minute and the OR schedule got messed up, it was a hot mess. I just got so distracted,” replied Meredith. 

“You should have paged me,” said Andrew. 

“You were busy,” stated Meredith. 

“I am never too busy for you,” responded Andrew. With that the conversation was over. 

Meredith stayed at the hospital for the next four days. The contractions finally completely stopped as Meredith and the baby’s heartrate returned to normal. Andrew brought Meredith home, where she would be stuck in their bed until the baby was ready to come. Meredith was definitely not happy about that. Staying in bed all day, everyday was unbearably boring. She couldn’t even go downstairs or play with the kids, unless they come up to see her. 

Andrew did his best to make things better for her. He cooked her all of her favorite foods and got all of her favorite movies. He gave her baths and played his guitar and sang for her. It is something he had done every once in awhile since they started dating. Meredith realized after the first time he did it, she judged him too quickly when he camped out on her couch. He was actually a very skilled player and was an even better singer. The baby loved Andrew’s singing too because they would move like crazy or completely calm down every time he did. 

Meredith continued to run her service from her bed, that Richard had temporarily started to control again. Meredith also organized her pro-bono surgeries from her computer and even taught a few classes to the residents from a livestream. 

Andrew’s boards were quickly approaching and Meredith used her free time to help him. She made him flash cards and quizzed him, much like Callie did when she was studying for her boards. Dr. Hayes even offered Andrew a fellowship if he passes. Carina checked in regularly and the day Andrew was supposed to leave to take his boards, were not different. 

“That’s it, I’m not going. I’ll take them next year,” stated Andrew. 

“No you are not! I am fine! The baby is fine! You are so ready for this Andrew and trust me, come this fall when all of your friends are attendings and you’re still in light blue scrubs, you’ll be so pissed at yourself for not taking them. It is one night and barely two days. Everything will be fine, you’ve got this,” responded Meredith. 

“I just don’t want to be in L.A. and you here if something goes wrong,” worried Andrew. 

“Andrea the plane ride is barely an hour. Even if Meredith were to go into labor, you’ll make it back in time. Just go, I’ll monitor her and check in with you,” suggested Carina. 

“Fine, okay. But Carina, you cannot leave her. I want hourly updates,” gave in Andrew.

“Okay Andrea,” agreed Carina. 

“Hey, everything is going to be okay. Go to L.A. and rock your boards. You are more than ready. Then come back here and get into some navy scrubs because I have a very strong feeling you will look incredibly sexy in them,” said Meredith. 

“Okay. I love you,” replied Andrew. 

“And I love you,” returned Meredith. 

Andrew gave Meredith a kiss goodbye and then leaned down to kiss her belly. 

“Now you stay in there until daddy gets home. I love you,” said Andrew to Meredith’s belly and then kissed it again. 

With that, Andrew left for the airport. He took the earliest flight out he could get after finishing his boards. He wasn’t even worried about his scores, he just wanted to get back to Meredith. Carina had texted him every hour with updates, all saying that both Meredith and the baby were fine. As Andrew got off the plane, he received a notification from the medical board. He passed and was now a board certified Pediatric Surgeon.

Meredith congratulated Andrew with a steamy make-out session. Sex could induce labor, so it stayed pretty PG-13 in the bedroom. Andrew was perfectly fine with that because there was nothing he loved more than kissing his girl. 

“I’m so proud of you,” whispered Meredith between kisses. 

“Thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you. From the years you were just my attending to the past two years where you have been my girlfriend. Thank you for everything,” replied Andrew. 

With her, Andrew felt like he could do anything and be anything. It didn’t matter that she was older and so far ahead in her career. It didn’t matter that he was bipolar. They were a perfect team that could get through anything together. From jail cells to mental illnesses, they held each other up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for continuing to the read my story! I'm With You is starting to wrap up for good. Not entirely sure the next chapter or the one after that will be last, but I'm thinking the next one.


	11. Oh darling, I'm With You.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter. Baby DeLuca enters into the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you all start reading, I just wanted to give one last huge thank you for reading. This is the first time I have ever wrote Grey's Anatomy fanfiction and all of your encouraging comments were so sweet throughout the publishing of this. I started writing this because I was annoyed/frustrated with how Merluca was being written on the show and how nearly the entire fandom had turned on them as soon as Andrew's illness started. I personally think they are a beautiful couple and deserved so much better this season. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the final chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it! :)

Meredith was just two and half weeks away from her due date. The baby could come at any moment and she tended to deliver early. That morning, Meredith awoke to the same pain that would signal it all. Thankfully, these contractions were not nearly as hostile as the ones a few months prior. At first, they were short with long distances between them. 

“Hey, Andrew. Wake up,” said Meredith. 

“Hmm. What? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?” questioned a groggy Andrew. 

“Yeah, I’m in labor,” announced Meredith. 

“What? Really? We should go to the hospital! Oh my God we never even packed a bag! We shou-,” panicked Andrew. 

“Andrew calm down. They are not consistent yet. We have time, this can last for hours,” calmed Meredith. 

“I still think we should go, especially with all the problems you’ve already had,” replied Andrew. 

“I’ve done this before, I know my body. We are fine. Now, go wake up the kids and get them ready for school. Oh, and can you make some chocolate-chip pancakes? I could really use some of those right now. And-oh here comes a contraction,” rambled Meredith. 

Andrew got closer to Meredith and rubbed her back. Meredith breathed through the slight pinching pain as the contraction finished in less than a minute. 

“You okay?” asked a terrified Andrew. 

“Yep. So pancakes?” answered Meredith like nothing had just happened. 

Picking a fight with a very pregnant woman who wanted pancakes was something Andrew knew not to do. The bigger she got and the longer she had to stay in bed, the easier it was to piss her off. Andrew kissed her cheek and went to wake up the kids. He woke up the girls first. Zola immediately got up and started her morning routine. Ellis was always such a sleepy head, so Andrew let her slowly wake up. Next, he woke up Bailey and helped him get ready. Finally, he returned to Ellis who was still resisting to wake up. 

“El-Belle, come on its time to get up,” said Andrew. 

“No Drew, I’m sleepy,” responded Ellis. 

“Come on princess. Today’s a big day. You have preschool, then Auntie Maggie is going to pick you up for daycare. And guess what, your baby brother or sister is going to be born today,” announced Andrew.

“Really?” gasped Ellis. 

“Yes! Which is why you have to get up, you can’t meet the baby if you’re sleeping,” responded Andrew. 

Ellis jumped out of bed and Andrew helped her get ready. She was always so sleepy and cuddly in the morning, so she had Andrew carry her for the rest of the morning. He didn’t mind though, he loved holding her and she gave the best hugs. She laid her head down on his shoulder and wrapped her tiny little arms around his neck. He did his best to cook the pancakes for all of them with one hand and sat her down on the counter when he needed to. Once they were eating breakfast, Andrew packed their lunches and announced to them that the baby was coming today. They wanted to stay home but Andrew promised it would be a long time before the baby was born, so they might as well go to school. Andrew delivered Meredith’s pancakes to her as the kids said goodbye. 

“I really don’t think I should leave you alone here. Why don’t you come with us and then we can go to the hospital after the kids are dropped off?” suggested Andrew. 

“Andrew, I’ve told you a million times. We have plenty of time, take the kids before you’re late. I’m fine,” rejected Meredith. 

Meredith gave all of her kids a kiss and hug goodbye and then Andrew gave her a kiss goodbye as well. Andrew was still nervous about leaving her alone, so he texted Carina and asked if she could stop by before going to work to make sure Meredith didn’t need to go to the hospital yet. There was a lot of traffic in the city, so it took Andrew over and hour to get back to the house. When he finally returned home, he was welcomed with the sound of Meredith moaning in pain. Without a second thought, Andrew ran upstairs to their bedroom. Carina was there rubbing Meredith’s back as Meredith was on all fours on the bed. 

“What’s going on?” questioned Andrew. 

“Baby decided to speed things up quite a bit. Contractions are very close together and for extended periods of time. The baby is ready to come at any moment,” answered Carina. 

As Carina spoke, Andrew took her place in rubbing Meredith’s back. 

“Okay, well we need to get to the hospital,” said Andrew. 

“I’m afraid it might be a little to late for that,” revealed Carina. 

Both Andrew and Meredith responded with a loud, “What”. 

“What do you mean it’s too late for that?” cried Meredith in pain. 

“You are ready to push at any moment Meredith. I really don’t think you’ll make it to the hospital in time. Either you have the baby here or in your car, but you will not be delivering the baby in the hospital,” answered Carina. 

Before Meredith could respond, she winced in pain as another contraction came. 

“Where do you keep your towels? And do you have a medical bag with any supplies?” asks Carina. 

“Towels are in the closet right outside the room and Meredith’s bag is downstairs on the kitchen counter. She has emergent surgical supplies inside of it,” said Andrew. 

Carina left to go get the things she asked for. 

“We’re having a baby at home,” realized Meredith. 

“Yes we are, just breathe everything is going to be okay,” said Andrew, not entirely sure if it was to calm her or himself. 

“This is crazy right? Nothing is sterile and our sheets are going to be ruined,” worried Meredith. 

“It is crazy, but it’ll be fine. People used to have babies at home all of the time. We also have a trained OB so that’s good. And I think it’s kind of beautiful that our child will be born on the same bed it was created in,” reassured Andrew. 

Meredith laughed in response. She got up so she could lay her head on Andrew’s should. Andrew kissed her forehead and snuggled her. 

“That’s one way to look at it,” joked Meredith. 

“You can do this Mer,” promised Andrew. 

Meredith lifted her head and stared into Andrew’s eyes for a minute and smiled. Then she kissed him. Slow, tender, and full of love. 

“We get to meet our baby today,” whispered Meredith. 

“I can’t wait,” responded Andrew. 

Carina came back into the room and readjusted the bed to prepare it. Meredith removed her pants and underwear. The comforter was removed from the bed and replaced with towels. Other towels were placed on standby to clean the baby once it arrived. Andrew propped himself against the headboard and Meredith leaned back sitting in front of them. The same position they shared when they took a bath. The same position they shared throughout this pregnancy where Andrew would snuggle her and her swollen belly. Meredith propped her legs up into the proper position. 

“Okay, Meredith on the next contraction I need you to push,” coached Carina. 

Meredith braced herself as she felt the contraction come on and pushed as soon as it did. She pushed with every ounce of strength she had in her body. Each time she finished she would gasp for air and lay her head on Andrew’s shoulder. Andrew encouraged her through her pushes and placed kisses on the side of her head every time she finished. 

“You’re almost there Meredith. The head is coming through. Just a few more, you’re doing great,” stated Carina. 

Meredith pushed again and finally, the baby came out. Carina cleared the baby’s nose and mouth so it could breathe. Then they heard it cry, Andrew and Meredith immediately started tearing up as well. 

“It’s a boy!” congratulated Carina. 

Carina knew without the proper equipment, the best thing for the baby right now was to keep him as close to his mama as possible, so he placed him in Meredith’s arms so they could do skin-to-skin. This would help baby boy adjust by regulating breathing and temperature.

“Hi baby,” greeted Meredith. 

Andrew was a mix of smiling and crying, just taking in the image of his son with the love of his life. 

“Oh my God, he’s so beautiful,” beamed Andrew. 

Meredith snuggled her baby boy and kissed his head. He finally started to calm down and his cries started to stop. Meredith turned her head to look at Andrew. They exchanged a look, then kissed, then continued to look at their newborn son. 

Carina let them have their moment for as long as she could. Then she took the baby and cleaned him off. Andrew got up to help her and once she was done, she placed him in Andrew’s arms. 

“Meet your papa baby boy,” said Carina.

Andrew just marveled at his perfect son. This perfect, beautiful life that he created with the woman he loves more than anything. Nothing in his life could even come close to how amazing this moment was for him. As Andrew bonded with the baby, Carina checked on Meredith. She cleaned up the area and stitched her up. After this, Andrew placed the baby in his mother’s arms. 

“Hello there sweet boy,” said Meredith taking him into her arms. 

Carina called the ambulance, once they came they were all transferred to Grey-Sloan. They were welcomed with all of their coworkers trying to catch a glimpse of the new baby. Meredith and Andrew allowed just Amelia and Maggie to join them in their private room. Both Meredith and the baby were cleared that everything was alright. Meredith even got to breastfeed him for the first time. Once the chaos had settled, the kids were finally out school and came to meet their baby sibling. 

“He’s so cute,” observed Zola. 

“Can we hold him mama?” asked Ellis. 

“As soon as you guys wash your hands,” agreed Meredith. 

The room was filled with the kids, Carina, Maggie, and Amelia. 

“Does he have a name?” asked Bailey. 

“Mateo Sebastian DeLuca,” revealed Andrew. 

“Mateo, that’s a beautiful name,” said Maggie. 

“Hi baby Mateo,” said Zola. 

The kids washed their hands and took turns holding the baby. Carina pulled Andrew aside. 

“I can’t believe my baby brother is a father,” said Carina. 

“To be honest, me either,” responded Andrew.

“Mateo Sebastian huh?” questioned Carina. 

“Meredith wanted him to be named after me and I wanted him to be named after mama some way as well,” explained Andrew. 

Mateo, a family name, is also Andrew’s middle name. Sebastian, was his mother’s maiden name. 

“I think it’s beautiful and he’s perfect too. Sono cosi felice per te fratellino (I’m so happy for you little brother),” stated Carina. 

“Ti amo (I love you),” responded Andrew.

The DeLuca siblings hugged and Andrew got back to his family. The next day, Meredith and the baby were discharged from the hospital. Maggie started staying with them again temporarily to help out with the bigger kids. 

As Mateo turned two weeks old, Andrew got lost in his thoughts staring at his son. All he could think about was his childhood and his relationship with his father. 

“Hey, you okay?” asked Meredith pulling him out of his thoughts. 

“Yeah, I was just thinking about my dad which made me start thinking about me. Mer, I want Mateo to have a better life than me. I don’t want him to witness me having a manic episode. Not only him, but Zola, Bailey, and Ellis as well. I need you to promise me, that if I ever get out of control you’ll leave or kick me out or whatever you need to do. I want them to have better,” said Andrew. 

“Andrew, I will never do that. I’m not going to ever leave you when you need me the most. Trust me, those kids would much rather have a father than none at all. You are strong and so-so kind. You can get through this. You can do better for Mateo than your father did for you,” responded Meredith. 

“What-What if I passed bipolar onto him?” asked Andrew. 

“Then we will love him and take care of him. We’ll get him through it and show him that his dad managed to be an amazing father, a brilliant surgeon, and an incredible husband while all managing to have bipolar,” answered Meredith. 

“Husband?” questioned Andrew. 

“Well of course, if you ever get around to asking me. I mean it’s only the right thing to do, seeing how you knocked me up and all,” joked Meredith. 

Andrew smiled at her. He had wanted to be her husband since the time he kissed her on that rooftop. With her past, he wasn’t sure if she even wanted that again and he was fine with it if she didn’t. He was just happy to be able to love her. Andrew knew now she was ready and he would ask her, just not right now. He wanted it to be special, she deserved only the best. Just then, Mateo started to cry. 

“Oh mi amor (my love) you’re okay,” calmed Meredith as she took him out of Andrew’s arms. 

“That’s not a diaper changing cry or a feeding cry. What should we do?” worried Andrew. 

“Get your guitar and sing to him. He always calmed down when you sang to him in the womb,” suggested Meredith. 

Andrew got his guitar and adjusted himself onto the bed. Meredith snuggled Mateo in her arms as he continued to cry. 

“I wrote this song for you Mer awhile ago. It’s called, I’m With You,” said Andrew. 

Meredith smiled at him as Andrew strung the guitar. Andrew then started to sing and immediately Mateo calmed down. Meredith just watched Andrew and listened to the lyrics that were meant just for her. 

“I saw you standing there sandy blonde hair, the way it came tumbling down just like a waterfall.   
And if you need a light, I’ll be the match to your candle my darling.   
I’m ready to burst into flames for you. 

I was just coasting till we met.   
You remind me just how good it can get.

Well I’ve been on fire dreaming of you.  
Tell me you don’t, it feels like you do.   
Looking like that, you’ll open some wounds.   
How does it start? And when does it end?   
Only been here for a moment, but I know I want you.   
But is it too soon? To know that I’m with you.   
There’s nothing I can do. 

And sometime around one, we fell asleep to escape from the sun.   
And we woke up to the sound of a storm outside.  
We stood at your front door, you looked at me and said baby this rain changes everything.   
And my heart ran away from me. 

I was just coasting till we met.   
You remind me just how good it can get.

Well I’ve been on fire, dreaming of you.   
Tell me you don’t, it feels like you do.   
Opening up can open some wounds.   
How does it start? And when does it end?   
Only been here for a moment, but I know I want you.   
Darling I do, I’m with you. 

There’s nothing I won’t do to see you shine.   
I’ll swing for the fences, I’ll run to the line.  
And it’s high time that you love me, because you do it so well.   
To see you shine, I’ll swing for the fences, I’ll run to the line.   
And it’s high, high time. 

Oh darling, I’m with you.  
Oh darling, I’m with you.   
There’s nothing I won’t do, there’s nothing I won’t do.   
I’m with you.   
Oh, darling, I’m with you,” sang Andrew. 

As Andrew sang the song, Meredith thought of all the things the lyrics reminded her of. All the moments that got them to where they are now. From yelling at him the first day she met him when he was an intern, to him crashing on her couch, to him kissing her at the wedding, to the elevator when he announced that once he started kissing her he would not stop, to the time he met her kids, to when they both said I love you, to her trial, to his manic episode, to the time she told him she was pregnant, and finally to right now. With their son asleep in her arms. 

Andrew DeLuca. The one she did not see coming. Her unexpected love. The man she loved despite the fact that he was a resident when they first got together. The man she loved despite the fact that he dated her sister. The man she loved despite the fact he was her resident for four years and she never saw him like this. The man she loved despite the fact that he had a bad history with Alex. The man she loved despite the fact that he was not Derek Shepherd. 

Meredith Grey loves Andrew DeLuca. More than she ever thought she could. And Meredith Grey would continue to love Andrew DeLuca for the rest of her life. 

The end…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That is the end! Welcome to world baby Mateo Sebastian DeLuca! A few final words: if you want to hear the song Andrew sang to Meredith just look up I'm With You by Vance Joy on YouTube, it reminds me so much of them. Also, there is more coming from me. I want to make this version of Merluca a series, so we can see the growth of their relationship with Mateo and the rest of Mer's kids. The series will include a range of one-shots to longer stories. I also have an idea for another fanfiction that is rewriting one of Meredith's storylines to fit Andrew into it. I'm not entirely sure if that will be included in the series, or set differently. That will start being published most likely after season 16 finishes. Thank you for reading!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so here’s the tea: I have no freaking idea what krista vernoff is doing with merluca, but I really don’t appreciate it. I love them very much and going into season 16 I thought they would be fine, but they haven’t been truly fine since like October and I’m hecka confused. But I really like the current storyline of addressing mental illness and it would be a million times better if Hayes and Mer weren’t flirting in the middle of surgery. So, in my story, they are going to work through it together. I’m taking inspiration from the show, but not following it to the tee. And this first part was just a set-up of how Meredith is feeling, coming chapters will have more of a story and not just a narration. Hope you all enjoy Merluca army and that our soft boy Andrew will be okay.


End file.
